It's Advent...

But, being my lazy self, I have no thoughts about Advent. Instead, I have a song:

"Morning-room in Heaven"
Written by Oscar Wilde, Histor the Wise, and the Bonsai Story Generator


She is in the way, Shropshire is your sake.
By the whole question of a first-rate brand.
Bring me Algy, Algernon, I am sure.
Very nearly offering a large reward.

Good heavens!
Just give my consent.
Good heavens!
I allow you Jack.

I never think that is for Gwendolen.
First place girls never marry the present.
That will do, Lane, thank you. Yes, that business.
I was very good bread and butter, Jack.

Good heavens!
Just give my consent.
Good heavens!
I allow you Jack.

Really, if you want my cigarette case.
This cigarette case is no use of them?
They are ordered specially invented for that,
Gwendolen is perfectly delightful!

Good heavens!
Just give my consent.
Good heavens!
I allow you Jack.

All the lines are - were, actually - from the play The Importance of Being Ernest. I just put it into the generator, parsed the text, put it into stanzas....

Now I just need a tune. You can sing the verses to the tune of "Johnny B. Goode," but the chorus of this "song" and of "Johnny B. Goode" don't match up at all.

"Offertory Hymn"

(Dedicated to Cathy of Alex, who asked for it, and to a certain church in Waxahachie, TX....)

Loudly, harshly
Starts the Offertory
Organ, guitar,
Join in cacophony

Hastily the senses
Erect their best defenses...

Saints and angels
Stop their meditation
Poor souls quake at
This new irritation:

"Take those things away!
We were just trying to pray!
How are we supposed to raise our hearts to Him...

While list'ning to that Offertory Hymn?"

Song: "I Hung My Head"

Today I listened to Johnny Cash's song "I Hung My Head." Incredible, tragic song. Not to mention that the accompanying bass is perfectly suited to the lyrics.

I Hung My Head

- sung by Johnny Cash

Early one morning,
With time to kill
I borrowed Jebb's rifle
And sat on a hill
I saw a lone rider
Crossing the plain
I drew a bead on him
To practice my aim
My brother's rifle
Went off in my hand,
A shot rang out
Across the land
The horse, he kept running
The rider was dead
I hung my head
I hung my head

I set off running
To wake from the dream
My brother's rifle
Went into the Sheen
I kept on running
Into the south lands
That's where they found me
My head in my hands
The sheriff he asked me
Why had I run
And then it came to me
Just what I had done
And all for no reason
Just one piece of lead
I hung my head
I hung my head

Here in the court house
The whole town was there
I see the judge
High up in the chair
Explain to the court room
What went through you mind
And we'll ask the jury
What verdict they find
I felt the power
Of death over life
I orphaned his children
I widowed his wife
I begged their forgiveness
I wish I was dead
I hung my head
I hung my head
I hung my head
I hung my head

Early one morning
With time to kill
I see the gallows
Up on a hill
And out in the distance
A trick of the brain
I see a lone rider
Crossing the plain
And he'd come to fetch me
To see what they'd done
And we'd ride together
To kingdom come
I prayed for God's mercy
For soon I'd be dead
I hung my head
I hung my head
I hung my head
I hung my head

Dark and disturbing, but a great song.

Now for some more music!

"Pyscotic Reaction," by the band Count Five.



It's odd. These guys are wearing clothes I usually reserve for national holidays, weddings, and funerals - to sing rock music.

For the curious, "Pyschotic Reaction" seems to have been the only hit this band had. It's bad luck to have a band member named Mouse, I suppose.

HUMOROUS SONG ABOUT FAST FOOD?

Or SUBTLY SATIRICAL COMMENT UPON AMERICAN CULINARY VALUES?

You decide.

For those interested, this was sung at the summer program I went to.

The Sucrose Inquisition is inquiring into the identity of the singer, the squash, and the cheeseburger. This video somehow awakened their latent suspicion.

I had to do a History test today....

Guess what I was listening to as I wrote on the Monroe Doctrine and the causes of the Civil War?

(sung by Edwin Starr)

War!
-huh-yeah
what is it good for?
absolutely nothing
Say it again

War-I despise
'Cos it means destruction
Of innocent lives

War means tears
To thousands of mothers how
When their sons go off to fight
And lose their lives

I said
War!
-huh
It ain't nothing but a heartbreak
War!
Friend only to the undertaker
It's an enemy of all mankind
the thought of war blows my mind

war has caused unrest within the younger generation (what a sentence for a pop song!)
induction
then destruction,
WHO WANTS TO DIE?

It ain't nothing but a heartbreaker
War!
it got one friend that's the undertaker

War has shattered
Many young men's dreams
made him disabled, bitter, and mean
life is much too short and precious
to spend fighting wars these days

war can't give life, it can only take it away

It ain't nothing but a heartbreaker
War!
Friend only to the undertaker
We've got no place for it today (and still it persists....)

They say we must fight to keep our freedom
But Lord knows there's just got to be a better way

War!
War!
War-Good God, yall
Give it to me, yeah
What is it good for?

(Notes: I really liked the lead-in drum roll! More seriously, this songs, although very good in what it's against, has nothing about what it's for. That's where it messes up. I believe that all organizations based on opposition will fail eventually.)

It's Johnny Cash Night!

So, I'll just drag out this quote from the Song of Songs (I read it for Religion class):

"The flash of [love] is a flash of fire, a flame of Yahweh."

(8:6).

Compare it to "Ring of Fire." Not to justify the circumstances of the song, of course - just pointing out what seems to be a scriptural reference in one of Cash's songs.

And it had to happen in the Octave of Easter!

Johnny Cash's house burnt down just the other day.

I know he's dead, but that doesn't mean we should torch his house.

Unrelated quote:

"Live fast,
Die young,
Bull Rider."

- "Bull Rider" as sung by the Man in Black.

"Highway Patrolman"

Just for the heck of it, I'll fisk this song from Gerald Augustinus.

Highway Patrolman - Bruce Springsteen

My name is Joe Roberts I work for the state
I'm a sergeant out of Perrineville barracks number 8
I always done an honest job as honest as I could

Now that's comforting, officer.

I got a brother named Franky and Franky ain't no good

Now ever since we was young kids it's been the same come down
I get a call over the radio Franky's in trouble downtown
Well if it was any other man, I'd put him straight away
But when it's your brother sometimes you look the other way

Aristocratic corruption in a nutshell. Except the patrolman doesn't have 10,000 acres and 43, 000 people to deal with. And the aristocrat usually gets something out of ignoring his brother (who has the best army this side of the Rhine) when he pillages or destroys things.

Me and Franky laughin' and drinkin' nothin' feels better than blood on blood
Takin' turns dancin' with Maria as the band played "Night of the Johnstown Flood"
I catch him when he's strayin' like any brother would
Man turns his back on his family well he just ain't no good

What with my 11 siblings and all, staying out of law enforcement might be a good idea for me.

Well Franky went in the army back in 1965
I got a farm deferment, settled down, took Maria for my wife
But them wheat prices kept on droppin' till it was like we were gettin' robbed
Franky came home in '68, and me, I took this job

Yea we're laughin' and drinkin' nothin' feels better than blood on blood
Takin' turns dancin' with Maria as the band played "Night of the Johnstown Flood"
I catch him when he's strayin', teach him how to walk that line
Man turns his back on his family he ain't no friend of mine

Well the night was like any other, I got a call 'bout quarter to nine
There was trouble in a roadhouse out on the Michigan line

I presume he's referring to the Michigan-Ohio border.

There was a kid lyin' on the floor lookin' bad bleedin' hard from his head
there was a girl cryin' at a table and it was Frank, they said

"Well, Sergeant, just because you've never arrested your brother despite having been sent for him 23 times doesn't mean you can't go 'arrest' him this time..."

Well I went out and I jumped in my car and I hit the lights
Well I must of done one hundred and ten through Michigan county that night

Anyone who enforces the rules will also break the rules. God, for instance.

It was out at the crossroads, down round Willow bank
Seen a Buick with Ohio plates behind the wheel was Frank

Well, with your superturbocharged Crown Victoria chasing it, that Buick should have no chance. Right, officer? Riiiiiight?

Well I chased him through them county roads till a sign said Canadian border five miles from here
I pulled over the side of the highway and watched his taillights disappear

If I'm not mistaken, Frank, to avoid prosecution for assault and mattery, attempted manslaughter, and/or murder, has just driven out of Ohio, through Eastern Michigan, and has exited the United States south of Detroit. And only - only! - his brother was following him. What a ride.

Me and Franky laughin' and drinkin' Nothin' feels better than blood on blood
Takin' turns dancin' with Maria as the band played "Night of the Johnstown Flood"
I catch him when he's strayin' like any brother would
Man turns his back on his family well he just ain't no good

The moral? Blood is thicker than water, let alone badges. Personally, I would have caught my brother and whacked him hard upside the head. Still illegal, but just after a fashion.

All the same, this is the sort of music I like. Serious dealing with lowdown subjects.