...or, "Much ado about nothing"

Diogenes is generalizing here, but it's true.

My guess is liturgical tomfoolery is mostly inspired by people who sit around thinking, "You know, modern Americans live a crude, ugly, uninspired life. No matter how wonderful their characters or how wild their adventures, they have to do them within the confines of ugly buildings and unflattering "practical" clothes. Perhaps we should allow them to do something poetically and expressively, the way folks did back in....[here they suppress their urge to mention the late Middle Ages and the Renaissance, when being a lackey at the Holy Mass was worth the bother]...the early Church."

Of course, it doesn't convince them to make beautiful churches or splendid outfits for their altar servers, but that doesn't matter. What matters is they're mostly interested in the "experience" of the Mass. Of course, most Catholics view Mass as a sort of large grace-dispensing machine, where they pay an hour of time and get various graces in return (and, if they bother to pray during the Mass, some actual spiritual growth). When these groups meet, you get the typical church: a bevy of altar servers/choir singers/performers who try to please indifferent people who are mostly just waiting for Communion. And a priest, we can't forget that.

In Keeping with my tradition of not having anything to do with important cultural issues...

I present to you this question: Did Moses have horns? (I don't know what Daniel Mitsui's authority on this matter is, other than that he's at least a well-informed amateur student of religious art, and sells his own religious art.)

On the one hand, you'd expect someone who spoke with God to shine, not sprout horns. On the other hand, not all horned creatures are evil - unicorns, for instance. (I'd argue that, if Moses had horns, it would refer to the ram which God sent to Abraham, since both were God-given gifts which prevented the Chosen Race from getting exterminated.)

Of course, it doesn't help matters that this statue of Moses makes him look like Zeus in the process of having Athena pop out of his head..

I got the reference...and I'm praying for EegahInc...

Then again, what's wrong with being a freak, anyway? Gooble, gooble, gooble, gooble, gooble...

Go ahead and pray for EegahInc too.

This I find quite disturbing....

These two websites (Catholic News Agency and Catholic News Service) give two conflicting reports on the same story. The CNA article, it seems, doesn't mention something the CNS article does.

I'm just so confused....which one is right, and which one isn't?

UPDATE: Here's more on the issue, from Australia and England respectively.

While dredging the Web, I found this:

"There's no energy on the non-zealot side of the cultural debate."

Some quotes - like this one - are just too exquisite to pass by. And so, taking a page out of G. K. Chesterton's book Tremendous Trifles, I will attempt to parody its style.

• There's a disappointing lack of Republicanism in the Democratic Party nowadays.



• Unfortunately, there's little sympathy for OU's football team among UT fans.



• Surfers, oddly enough, don't like to live in Nebraska.



• Saladin didn't actively support Richard the Lionheart's cause.



• Fish adamantly refuse to take part in marathons, despite a major publicity campaign aimed at getting "FINS ON THE ROAD!"

In more current news...

The Pope, for some reason, is "bypassing" Boston in his upcoming visit - point of fact, he's only going to New York and Washington, D.C. This, I suppose, proves beyond a doubt that Boston is now flyover country.

I think a lot of people are regretting the decision to let China have the Olympics. They're putting cell phone towers on Mount Everest, prohibiting Olympic athletes/attendees from having bibles...something tells me they'll next put a huge statue of Mao Zedong holding the Olympic Rings in Beijing. (By the way, the word "Beijing" is a blight on the eyes. Unlike "Peking" which had a tasteful clearness and lack of dots.)

In Venezuela, "reforming" a constitution apparently means creating a dictator and eliminating freedom of the press. Maybe they meant "reforming" in the sense that this is "reforming" a birthday cake.

Oh, and D.G.D. Davidson and I are doomed to MORTAL COMBAT!

On one side, the veteran of countless archaeological encounters and international Sharp Trowel Expert, on the other, a veteran of The Simplification with world-renowned prowess in blunt weaponry...

In the case of , um, this blog going dormant, I'll just say I don't much regret what I've done with my life (except the one time I used my sister's copy of Persuasion as tinder....and the time I ate Tabasco sauce straight....and some other things...)

Over and out.

Since I'm reviewing a book on the Vietnam War...

Here's some stuff related to the '60s and/or Vietnam...

Sixties gun: the M16A1,

Another Sixties gun: the M21 sniper rifle,

Sixties pope: John XXIII, of sacred memory,

Sixties book: the classic Green Eggs and Ham,

Sixties music: Creedence Clearwater Revival's "Fortunate Son."

Ladies and gentlemen, we are set. Now, off to write that review.

Government regulation of book price in Germany: how lovely!

The worst thing is that this, in effect, is a 60 percent tax on BOOKS, effected by means of price controls.

Mark that: BOOKS ARE BEING TAXED.

Books are the things that separate civilization from barbarism. The things that keep us from having to spear our own food and cook it over brushfires. The things that, more commonly, give us a worthwhile thing to do at the doctor's office.

And they drive up the price!

Admittedly, there's relatively few books worth buying in any case (browse any bookstore and you'll see what I mean), but those that are are being unjustly taxed.

Makes me wonder: are there laws on reselling books in Germany?

"Offertory Hymn"

(Dedicated to Cathy of Alex, who asked for it, and to a certain church in Waxahachie, TX....)

Loudly, harshly
Starts the Offertory
Organ, guitar,
Join in cacophony

Hastily the senses
Erect their best defenses...

Saints and angels
Stop their meditation
Poor souls quake at
This new irritation:

"Take those things away!
We were just trying to pray!
How are we supposed to raise our hearts to Him...

While list'ning to that Offertory Hymn?"

Yes, I have a driver's license. Here's me driving.

No, I don't smoke. But I do have the sunglasses!

"Today, law enforcement in Orem has enshrined itself as the laughing stock of our country by prosecuting a 70-year-old great-grandmother...

...for not watering her lawn."

Drag out the principle of subsidarity, and we discover that whether one waters his lawn or not is a question best answered at the family level, or at most the neighborhood level. Certainly not the city level.

If I had my way, watering lawns would be discouraged in polite society. (I mean watering them with water. Don't be crude.)

The Sucrose Inquisition wants to say:

Even we are never this hypocritical!

We may be cruel, we may stick squashes into the garbage disposal, we may torment sheep and Monty Python characters, but we've never applied a double standard to the celebration of the Mass!

- The Sucrose Inquisition

Random note:

Was whoever said "All things in moderation" thinking of bullet wounds?

Concerning the recent hullabaloo about Mother Theresa....

So what if she said "I have no faith?"

It's not as shocking as this.

Just in case my dad didn't notice....

"What father among you, if his son asks for a fish, will instead of a fish give him a serpent;

or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion?

If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children,

how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!"

HUMOROUS SONG ABOUT FAST FOOD?

Or SUBTLY SATIRICAL COMMENT UPON AMERICAN CULINARY VALUES?

You decide.

For those interested, this was sung at the summer program I went to.

The Sucrose Inquisition is inquiring into the identity of the singer, the squash, and the cheeseburger. This video somehow awakened their latent suspicion.

A very important moral question is answered here

So now you'll know what to do.

On a related note, here are some important quotations from my summer trip:

"Can I have your earring again?"

"Can a dog be happy?"

"I know that I do not know that I know that I don't know."

(Two of these originated with your good author. Guess which one didn't.)

Reflection on languages

As some of you may know, I study Latin. I'm not that good at it, but study Latin I do. Anyway, the language is complex - each noun has five (occasionally six) declension, each verb has about 36 different forms, and so forth.

Latin is very elaborate. As a result, it is worse (in certain respects) than modern English. English is not as hard to learn, and can easily absorb technical and foreign words. Over time, Latin degenerated into more handy, convenient versions such as French and Spanish, which are approximately as complex as English. Language thus has evolved from complex to simple, rather than the other way around.

Then again, Latin is rather simple. It gives each word the fewest number of meanings possible - "domi," for instance, only means "at home" - and has standard rules for every situation. In contrast, the English language uses a bunch of prepositions and very few suffixes, making it necessary to guess a word's meaning from the context of the sentence it is in. (For instance, the "it" I just used. Is "it" a word, a meaning, a guess, a necessity? You have to figure out.)

So Latin is more complex than English, since there are so many rules, but more simple, since those rules are more universally applied. What practical use this can be put to, I leave to someone with more time.

Thanks to Mulier Fortis...

I checked my site, and.....SOME FACELESS COMMIE MANDARIN BLOCKED MY WEBSITE!

Maybe it was Crawdad's review of Dune? My reflections on extrovert-introvert tensions within the Church? Or maybe the post with the lyrics of "War" by Edwin Starr?

Well, as long as I'm annoyed at the Chinese, I mind as well have some fun with it.

---------------------------------------------------

I hereby challenge Fu Manchu (C'mon, we all know you're back there somewhere, rigging the Communist Party elections, coercing recalcitrant Chinese Commies, etc.) to SINGLE COMBAT!

The weapons shall be precisely one crustacean and any amount of poisonous liquids that can be carried by one man.

The location shall be any that Fu Manchu chooses.

The time shall be any that Fu Manchu Chooses.

The fight shall be to the death of either party. I shall not surrender, and I do not expect Fu Manchu to do so.

Fu Manchu may bring one henchman, as I shall bring H.L. Crawdad, both of whom may fight to the death or not, as they may so desire.

And should you want a reason, O Honorable Manchu...through your Communist agents you have prohibited the refreshing goodness of my blog to leaven the people of China, even though they have shown a desire to do so. This offense against my honor and God-given right to talk to everyone cannot be apologized for.

Fu Manchu, I await your answer, and trust that you shall send it soon. I have schoolwork to do and cannot neglect it while waiting for your response.

(Signed)

Histor the Wise, honorable son of Dadwithnoisykids.

I gotta raise this somehow....

From Fr. Joe.

Raulito got the same rating, just one of many similar incidents he and I have noticed concerning blog quizzes.

I had to do a History test today....

Guess what I was listening to as I wrote on the Monroe Doctrine and the causes of the Civil War?

(sung by Edwin Starr)

War!
-huh-yeah
what is it good for?
absolutely nothing
Say it again

War-I despise
'Cos it means destruction
Of innocent lives

War means tears
To thousands of mothers how
When their sons go off to fight
And lose their lives

I said
War!
-huh
It ain't nothing but a heartbreak
War!
Friend only to the undertaker
It's an enemy of all mankind
the thought of war blows my mind

war has caused unrest within the younger generation (what a sentence for a pop song!)
induction
then destruction,
WHO WANTS TO DIE?

It ain't nothing but a heartbreaker
War!
it got one friend that's the undertaker

War has shattered
Many young men's dreams
made him disabled, bitter, and mean
life is much too short and precious
to spend fighting wars these days

war can't give life, it can only take it away

It ain't nothing but a heartbreaker
War!
Friend only to the undertaker
We've got no place for it today (and still it persists....)

They say we must fight to keep our freedom
But Lord knows there's just got to be a better way

War!
War!
War-Good God, yall
Give it to me, yeah
What is it good for?

(Notes: I really liked the lead-in drum roll! More seriously, this songs, although very good in what it's against, has nothing about what it's for. That's where it messes up. I believe that all organizations based on opposition will fail eventually.)