Wednesday, September 19, 2007

The ZOMBIES are coming!

Alright folks, basic tips:

1. Anything that isn't a zombie is human, and retains human dignity.
2. Zombies are to be killed as aggressors against the innocent, but are not culpable for their actions.
3. Zombies that are no longer animated are to receive the respect due to the bodies of the dead.
4. Recommended weapons: shotguns (loaded with Foster slugs or buckshot), rifles of .308 caliber or larger, pistols of .44 caliber or larger, anti-tank weapons of all sorts, Molotov Cocktails, hand grenades, large cars. Preferred weapon: the FLAMETHROWER!
5. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES WHATSOEVER SHOULD YOU LET ANYONE GET WITHIN BITING DISTANCE OF YOURSELF. MAKE THIS CLEAR TO ALL FAMILY MEMBERS, PASTORS, COLLEAGUES, ETC., IMMEDIATELY!

Survive - and don't be bitten.

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